I was 1, when my mother died. Or at least that's what I was told. Had no clue. Only seen her pictures, had no memory of her or her touch. Nothing. I was the only child, living with my father. We were best friends. He was my everything. My first love, my comforter, my provider. Everything. I was home-schooled. He said he wanted to protect me from the world. He made me believe everyone out there was out to hurt me. For years, he planted all these ideas into my head and with time, I believed nothing else but what he'd said to me. I had no friends, except him of course. I was 15 and I'd never had as little as a crush on anyone. He told me he was all I needed. I believed him.
Each month, he walked into the house with a new female. I hated them all. There was no love in sharing. I hated the thought of having to share him with anyone. When I expressed my discontent, he simply said to me, "Don't worry my love, they're nothing. Toys, if you may, you're the only one I love." And with that, I would blush to the moon and back and mutter an "Okay." I still wasn't happy with it but I figured he just wanted some company. Angered me but whatever made him happy, made me happy too.
Most nights, I went to bed in tears. No one knew why. No one could ever know why. However, that was about to change. I was in the kitchen making food for my birthday which was the following day. I was finally turning 18! Was excited. Reminiscing on my past years. They had gone by so fast. And as much as I hated to think about it, I said to myself, "How long will this go on ? I have barely even lived. How long will he continue to ..." stomping of feet interrupted my thoughts. I recognised my father's footsteps but he wasn't alone. I turned around and saw him with the prettiest lady I had ever seen in my life. And when she spoke, I was in awe. I fell in love with her that instant. And then, the jealousy kicked in and overshadowed any other thing I was feeling. She extended her hand for a handshake and said "Hi, I'm Sophie." I looked at the hand and walked away. She continued coming. For one month, I kept seeing her gorgeous face. I disliked her so much. And I had no problem showing it. What baffled me though was that, she was nothing but sweet to me. She repayed all my mean acts with nothing but kindness. I didn't know what to make of it! I'd been told all my life that people were nothing but wicked and here this woman was, trying to show me otherwise ??! She had to be a phony. Fake rubbish. I didn't like her one bit.
One night, I was crying again. It was worse. Everything hurt. I wanted to run away into the world of wickedness I had been told about. It seemed better than what I was living in. Sophie had moved in with us. Imagine that. She walked into my room and saw me crying. She said she had heard my sobbing. I told her, "Leave me alone. You have no business here." She said, "No, you're wrong. I know." I looked at her unbelievably. "You know ?", I whispered. She nodded in agreement. I said with wide eyes, "For how long ??" She said, "A long time." I fell into her arms and cried some more. She rubbed my back and told me it was okay. I looked at her again and said with nothing but fear, "I don't know what to do. Help me." That was the first time I actually wanted anyone's help. The way she hugged me made me believe she could help me. And she replied me by saying, "You will be my final good deed." I didn't understand but I didn't care. This person I despised so much, knew. And she was going to help.
The following day, I was awoken by vigorous knocking on the door. It was a struggle to separate my eyelids. My eyes were heavy from all the tears I had shed the previous night. The banging just got louder so I ran downstairs to rain curses on the person who had interrupted my sleep. I opened the door and saw two policemen. I stared at them with my swollen eyes filled with fury. They asked me, "Are you Alexis Smith ?" I replied, "Yes, I am." They looked at me with sympathy and said, "Your father was found dead this morning. Stabbed multipl..." Everything became dizzy. I was about to fall when they held me and stopped my fall. I was shocked. When ? What ? Who ? WHAT ?!? I started to cry. And stopped. I was confused. I didn't know if I was supposed to cry. This man had been my everything. And my nothing. I calmed down and asked. "What happened ?" They said he had been stabbed multiple times and the person who stabbed him had turned herself in. "Herself ?" I asked them. They said, "Yes, she is at the police station right now." I asked if I could go see her, they agreed.
When I got there, sophia was sitting down, being questioned. She was drenched in blood. I couldn't believe my eyes. After a few minutes, she came to me. I asked her, "They're mistaken, right ? You didn't do it, right ???" She looked at me and smiled and said "I did." I wondered what was so amusing about it. She was definitely going to end up in prison and it bothered me. I had just begun to like her. I looked at her with questioning eyes and asked her," Why ?!" She reluctantly answered, "I had to. I couldn't sit and watch him ruin your life. I suffered a similar fate when I was younger. Mine was worse because my mother knew and she did absolutely nothing to stop it. She would bath me and call him to sexually abuse me. At the age of 16, I ran away from home. I became a prostitute because I had nowhere to go. No one would believe me, I didn't bother. I sold my body for money to eat to sustain myself. I slept with a different person each day. He ruined my life. Now I have AIDS and I'm going to die in 3 months. Give or take a week. I knew your father was doing the same to you. At least I suspected. The signs were glaring. Last night, when I saw him leaving your room and zipping up his jeans , I walked into your room and saw you in tears and I knew. Everything came rushing back. All the suppressed hurt and anger and hate I had for my father came rushing back and I told myself, I wouldn't let this happen again. Not if I could stop it. I had to do something. And quite frankly, I don't regret it. You seem like a good kid. With a bright future ahead of you, don't let what he has done ruin the rest of your life. I never got the chance to bear a child. I had so many abortions it ruined my womb. You're like my child. I feel responsible for you. Promise me you'll be okay ? Promise ?" I was crying so much I could hardly speak. This woman was like my angel. She lifted my face up so that our eyes were on the same level and said "You're a survivor." I said quickly, "No, you're my saviour." She said, "Hey! That rhymed!!" I laughed and hugged her then two policemen came to take her away. Before she left, I mouthed, "I promise".
It had been a month and a half, she had been sentenced to life imprisonment with no chance of parole. I visited her every chance I got. The prison guards knew me by my first name. I became very familiar with them. They seemed to like me. We would talk and talk and I would tell her about my school. I got into college. I would tell her about my friends and she would be so glad and overjoyed. We would write random poems together. She became my companion. I loved her. I visited her until she passed away. When she did, I cried but I was happy I ever got to know her. I owed this woman my life. She saved me. I owed her everything. And so here I am, sitting in front of my computer, willing to tell the world about her but not finding the words just yet. However, I'm determined. Everyone must know. So I begin to type, "I was 1 when my mother di..."
